How Much Fun Can You Have?

Posted on January 6, 2012 by


Here in the Occupied Territory, the fun just never stops. Heck, it doesn’t even take a break.


Multnomah County Sheriff’s Deputies are searching for a man they said stole tools, two safes and valuable coins from a shed at a Corbett home belonging to his own father. The beauty here is that the coins alone were worth several thousand dollars – and they took the stash to one of those change-counting machines, where they managed to pocket a whopping $450.

On a brighter note, an amazing thing occurred in NE Portland: a bicyclist was actually cited by Portland police for unlawful lane change and improper use of lane! Will wonders never cease? The fact that he caused a wreck and ended up pinned face-down under a car may have had something to do with the citation – that, and the fact that rescue personnel had to lift 3500 pounds of lean, mean, big-oil-powered machine so that somebody could drag the self-centered fool out from under it. Said fool is listed in serious condition at a local hospital at present, but will doubtless be riding around again, flipping the bird at drivers, by summer.

And in a move that’s sure to enrage the Friends of Fanno Creek, Oregon’s DEQ has given Portland’s Bureau of Environmental Services the green light to continue spilling raw sewage into the pristine Tualatin River tributary for the next five years. Oh, BES is supposed to begin applying some band-aids to the sewers by November of 2013, but it seems to be one of those (wink, wink; hudge, nudge) difficult situations.

Interestingly, Portland BES wasted no time slapping “environmental overlays” onto the propery of owners residing along tributaries of pristine Fanno Creek, back in the late 1980’s. BES sent out perhaps 200 pages of documents to residents, informing them of the fact that they were not permitted to plant any non-native species within fifty feet of said tributaries, along with a slew of other requirements. It was stunning, as a property owner, to see that Vermont Creek, which ran through the very back of the property, some 150 feet from the house, was so important to “the ecosystem” that anymodifications to the structure must first be approved by Portland BES.

In order to be considered for approval, architectural renderings, together with a nonrefundable fee of $1200, were required. BES reserved the right to reject any proposed modifications.

And this agency has been cleared to continue raw sewage spills by Oregon DEQ.

MaxRedline: How Much Fun Can You Have?.

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